Not My Child Monday: Giving Hugs Instead of Shoves

For all your "Not Me Monday" needs, visit MckMama. I figured it's been a while since my last confession. This post might be a tough one for me to write for many reasons. Notice that I'm focusing on this being not MY child.

You see, my child-- my sweet, adorable, cute, and did I say sweet child is NOT a bully. She did NOT have to have time out every day last week at her sitter's homes. She did NOT have to have time-out in Kids' Club (like Sunday School at our church) yesterday. She is NOT taking toys away from other kids. NOT pushing kids. Not sneaking up to them and hitting or kicking them when she thinks an adult isn't looking. Nope, NOT this cute little girl...
...in her mommy's cute German outfit (made by my awesome seamstress grandma who is teaching me to sew). Sidenote: I'll have to find a picture of me in this outfit next time I'm home. And yes, it is supposed to be that short! :-)

Anyway, so about this NOT bullying thing. I never thought I'd have a child who was such a bully. We don't see much of this at home, but we're pretty sure that's because Cate is an only child right now. We do see her temper on a pretty regular basis, and even a bit of defiance sometimes, but nothing that really warrants a time out at home.

We know it's just a phase (hopefully), but still. It's embarrassing. I hate hearing how my normally sweet girl had to have time out. I hate asking her why she had to be in time out and hearing her say "I push." I guess it's good that she knows what she's doing. But really, how do we get her to stop?

So I did NOT go to our local bookstore this weekend and seek the bookseller's help in locating some books about sharing, being nice, and not being a bully. I did NOT come home with these two books: They were the books with the fewest words on each page (good for an almost two-year-old's short attention span). We've also NOT been talking to Cate all weekend about being nice and giving hugs instead of shoves. Another sidenote: I tried Family Christian first thinking they would have great resources and struck out big time. The books were all very wordy. Anyway...

We're also trying to praise Cate a lot for good behavior and trying to over-emphasize when she is doing something nice for someone else (like when she gave her buddy, Tanner, a hug at church today or went up to Baby Graham and nicely touched him instead of pushing him-- her normal reaction to babies). And when she does do something not nice, we are NOT starting to take away some of the things she likes, like these:
(yes, they are rubber penguins...I found them on sale at JoAnn's last week and she has been carrying all 11 of them around in a mini-tote bag ever since). She earns them back when she is doing something nice.

Oh these terrible two's may NOT be the death of me. And seriously, if you have any other suggestions for dealing with toddler bullying, particularly when your child is the bully, I'm open to advice-- I'm NOT starting to get a little desparate.

~Melody