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Sunday, December 11, 2011

Darkness Into Light

For a variety of reasons that I won't get into right now, I've been in a bit of a funk. A lot of it is that I haven't felt physically well since Thanksgiving. And a lot of that has to do with weaning Brennan-- partly because I'm ready to be done and partly because the flu that knocked me out at the beginning of November depleted my supply and I really didn't want to put the effort into getting going again (I had enough stock in the freezer to get my boy to his 11th month). So now we're down to pumping/nursing in the morning (pump on school days/nurse on weekends) and nursing before bed. And my body is pretty much in hormonal hell. Which has left me pretty much in a funk.

I talked to my doctor about this on Friday, opened up to some family and friends later that night, spent some time at a restoration yoga with massage workshop yesterday, enjoyed a candle light service at church this morning, and had a wonderful friend pray with me this afternoon. And you know what? I'm starting to feel better.

I know my doctor still has tests to run. I know my body still has some healing to do. I know I have a long way to go to feel totally better. But I'm confident that this is the beginning of the end of dealing with all of this. I know this funk is temporary and that these physical symptoms won't last forever. I wrapped some presents this weekend, worked on addressing Christmas cards, and am catching more of the spirit. My funk seems to be lifting and I can only give credit to God for answering my prayers for healing. Because He's brought it through family, friends, the wisdom of my doctor, and time to relax this weekend. And I know He'll continue to heal me as I work through all of this.

I've got seven teaching days left until break. And I'm really, really looking forward to that break. I'm looking forward to presents under the tree (yup, we have to have a gate with little man around). I'm looking forward to the joy I'll see on this girl's face come Christmas morning.
And I'm excited to see how this little guy reacts to all of the holiday festivities. And to his first birthday. I'm looking forward to days spent entirely in pajamas, some knitting, some vinyl (my husband has quite the growing collection), coffee, family, friends, and maybe, if we're lucky, some snow.

Merry 2 weeks until Christmas!

~Melody

3 comments:

mama marchand said...

Love ya, friend! *hugs* The tree looks fabulous!

TaterTotMom said...

Ugh! Post-nursing-weaning hormones. I have a couple more months before I'm going to be weaning and I'm not looking forward to the new "attitude" it will bring me. Hang in there!

LLF said...

I had trouble weaning, too, and all I can say is it does get better. It sounds like you're almost there! Enjoy your break from school. I love Christmas in Cincinnati. Maybe we'll run into you at the Festival of Lights, Museum Center, Duke Train Display, etc. :)